The Defintion of a NewsWagoner (As told by an (ex?) Con)

A good way to describe a(n) (ideal?) Newswagoner is somebody who has been too idealistic once and in anticipation/actual smashing of his ideals (given contact with the real world) has made him disillusioned with the world, thereby turning him into a cynical bastard. His negative energies are then pushed outwards towards the college junta on whom he vents his anger and exposes their miniature intellects. His is nearly always brilliant and likes to exhibit it on a platter. Incredibly conceited and vain, he is one of the most confused entities on earth and resorts to satire to exhale his frustration. He is anonymous and resents and loves it simultaneously-loves it because it provides him solitude as and when it is required (trust me, he requires it often) and hates it because his brilliance wants to be showcased to the world. And yes, most, most importantly, he does have a fucking good sense of humour-a developed sense of humour that is cynical, perverted, caustic, bitter, vitriolic, scathing, satirical and irreverent. Not like the wimps' (read 'Wimps=Those who like pink bunnies') who go to the toilet and cry their hearts out when their name appears in Newswagon. And yes, because his ideals have not still been erased from his head completely, he is either fanatically moral or fanatically immoral, (sometimes at the same time). So he can have very, very high standards from himself-most of them quite ridiculous, considering his track-record.